Relationships are hard work guys! They constantly need to be maintained and kept up. A relationship can not survive if neither of the parties involved are caring for it.
At the start of the relationship – life is wonderful, you are still in the honey moon phase and then as time goes on the romance starts to fade and so on – and this is what happens in majority of relationships these days!
One thing that I am adamant about is to never lose the spark in my relationship even if life gets in the way sometimes.
HERE ARE MY TOP TIPS ON HOW TO CONSTANTLY THRIVE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP!
1. LEARN TO SPEAK ONE ANOTHERS LOVE LANGUAGE
There are 5 primary ways people express and receive love best: words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, quality time and touch. Learn to meet each other in the middle if you do not share the same love language.
If touch is most important to them – be sure to flood them with affection, if words is the most important thing to them – be sure to motivate, compliment and communicate with them.
2. LEARN TO COMMUNICATE WITH ONE ANOTHER
Communication is everything in a relationship, without it – you have nothing! Be aware of your partners needs as it is a fundamental aspect of a healthy relationship. Talk it out and be open!
3. BE A LISTENER BEFORE A SPEAKER
“Seek first to understand, not be understood”
My boyfriend and I have almost been together a year and in that time we have argued passionately, debated, we have been in tears and we have walked away from each other. It’s very hard to establish a pattern of listening before speaking especially if you do not agree on something. It’s important to re instate to your partner what you think they are saying to you before speaking up so you both understand what is being said to one another.
Interrupting one another and raising your voice leads to frustration which otherwise could of been a calm conversation. Even if you do not agree with your partner being upset – that’s the reality of the situation. Listen carefully – it could just be a misunderstanding rather than a conflict of ideas..
No, I don’t mean expensive overseas trips. I mean, be spontaneous! The other night my boyfriend and I were going home and it was around 9pm. We were at the lights and he turned to me and said “let’s go to the beach” I was in my pj’s and had no shoes but I looked at him and said “lets do it!”
Be spontaneous in your relationship – come home from work with some movie tickets, go to the beach in the middle of the night, go for a long drive and turn up the tunes, surprise your significant other with a weekend away, go get an ice cream and run a muck!
5. SHARING THE SAME GOALS AND DREAMS
What is a relationship if both of you are not on the same wavelength? Working towards the same goals creates a sense of happiness and security! Team work makes the dream work!!
Laughter is the best medicine, and it’s free! Being able to be your complete, innocent self in a relationship, laugh at yourself, laugh at your partner and do some strange things together keeps it alive and sparkling. If you two don’t laugh anymore or make fool of yourselves and one another – your relationship is cold and dead.
7. BE EXCITED ABOUT THINGS THEY ARE EXCITED ABOUT
In order to keep the enthusiasm, you need to stay engaged with the other persons interests and provide support. Having each others backs is a crucial part of a relationship. Cheer them on and encourage them – be their cheerleader!
8. DON’T WAIT TO BE ASKED TO DO SOMETHING NICE
It’s the little things like buying flowers, or their favourite food, or a new shirt or to help them with grocery shopping. It’s the small acts of kindness that matter rather stressing over big displays of affection
9. TREAT EVERY DAY LIKE IT’S YOUR FIRST DAY
Even if you’ve been together for a year or 5 years or 30 years and your not the same person you were back then. When I see Will when he comes home my heart and soul light up like the very first time I saw him and to be in his arms is what I look forward to every day.
Obviously this one goes without saying!
In order to constantly thrive in your relationship, it’s not about being aware that you have to give more love and attention. It’s about remembering to give love the time to live in it’s world. It’s dedicating a space to focus on the person that you love, and doing things that makes them feel strong and happy.
When you make a life with someone, you make a life with their pet peeves, their habits, their fears, and you love them for everything that they are
“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.”